Ahhh....

March 14th, 2012
Phoenix. Sun. Heat. Real heat. 28 degrees. The pool calls my name. It hear it clearly. Bootcamp waits. I don bathing suit. "Where did you get that mom?" queries son with strange look on face. He doesn't like it. I'm going sunbathing and I get a critic in the house. I head to pool, without critic. Lounge chair. Towel. Husband keeps boys in motel room to do "homework." That would be their English and French reading. I get peace and a chance to read the guidebooks. I plan the afternoon's activity. I turn over to tan other side. Lovely. I begin to fantasize about pool boy showing up with lunch. A quesadilla, guacamole, sour cream, and salsa served with a fruit drink topped with paper umbrella. Perfect. I am abruptly awakened from reverie by cold water bottle and bag of nuts tossed on my tanning body. That would be the 16 year old. He has no class. Husband delivers the youngest. Five year old says, "Mom, I like your top." I am going to keep that child. The rest of the kids join us. I should have brought a whistle. I am now official lifeguard and referee. No more reading. No more peace. The kids have a blast. I become pool girl. I make lunch and deliver poolside. The boys have inhaled it before I have a chance to sit down. This is the real life we live.

We drag boys from pool and head out to go hiking. They don't want to go hiking. It is 28 degrees. They want to stay in the air-conditioned motel room and play on computers or go horseback riding. Fat chance. Mother rules. We head to South Mountain Preserve, the largest municipal park in the world, to climb down The National Trail to Hidden Valley. We head out on the trail at 4 pm. We climb down to Fat Man's Pass.

We must pass through a crevice to get to the Hidden Valley. The boys squeeze through.

My husband says, "I'm too big. My chest is too big." He takes off the pack to slide through. I'm next. With a deadpan face, I announce, "No, my chest is too big." The 13 year grins wide and his eyes laugh. "I'm too buxom," I add. The 16 year looks embarrassed but he too is smirking. What a mother! The boys find the natural rock slides. They are slick, smooth and shiny. We slide them. We make it to The Tunnel. It's gorgeous. The Tunnel, Fat Man's Pass and the natural slides are why we came. We have to hustle back. The park closes at 7 pm and we need to drive out from the Trailhead. It is uphill. The light is perfect, the desert begins to glow. The camera battery dies. My blackberry is full. Good thing 16 year old has iPod. It is a race back to the car. I come in last but I have logged 2.5 hours of strenuous exercise. I think I win.

By Mom.